Getting enough sleep is
important so that the brain can work at maximum efficiency during the day. Staying up late to finish a project, cram for
a test or just watch a movie has a serious impact on both retention and
comprehension of what was learned that day, but also your child’s performance
in school the next day or two. Studies
have also shown that
toddlers need naps after learning in order to help them process the new
information. Even for adults, sleep (or
the lack of it) can have a serious impact on learning and memory. It’s not just workaholism that is the enemy
of efficiency – persistent lack of sleep has all sorts of negative impacts on
mental and physical health, emotional maturity and intellect. It is the parents’ responsibility to teach
the children how to manage their own time at home so that they get their
homework done in a timely manner (teach them to focus quality results achieved
within a specific, reasonable timeframe – if you’re unsure about the timeframe, ask their teacher) and can get
to bed on time. DO NOT let your child
stay up late to finish what is not done.
They should either finish it in the morning, at school before the class
in question, or accept the consequences of their failure to complete their
work.
The younger a child is, the more sleep s/he needs, and forcing a child
to stay up late just isn’t fair or helpful, no matter how important you think
it is. Sleep needs vary, and some
children will need all that down time in one go at night, while others will
need most of it at night, but some after school in one or more naps. You’ll need to observe your child to know
what works best for him or her (not you), and you’ll have to keep in mind that
as s/he ages, the amount of hours will get lower and the need for naps will
most often disappear, but even some adults need a nap. I allow myself the luxury of a 30-minute nap
when I feel sleepy; people usually go into deep sleep after more than 30
minutes, which means that waking up prior to the end of deep sleep will make
you feel lethargic, unfocused and confused.
If I really feel I need extra sleep, I’ll set my alarm for 30-minutes,
wake up to the alarm, and set it for another 30!
Although sleep needs vary from individual to individual, adults need
8-9 hours of sleep, on average, while teens need 8.5-9.5 hours and children
need 10-11 (age dependent), but preschoolers need 11-13, toddlers 12-14,
infants may need 14-16 hours, and babies can need up to 18! Children with sleep disorders (restless leg
syndrome, snoring, insomnia, sleep apnea, periodic limb movement disorder, delayed/advanced
sleep phase insomnia, non-24-hour sleep-wake syndrome, narcolepsy, night
terrors, sleepwalking and talking, etc.) may just need to get extra sleep or to
be taught how to turn off their minds, but they may require therapy, or
possibly medication or special machines like nebulizers and PAPs. In the end, sleep needs vary from one person
to the next, even though they are of the same age and gender!
One of the greatest problems of most societies is that we are
never taught that it is not necessary to think non-stop every day for our
entire lives. Not only do most people
never stop thinking, but their thinking is uncontrolled and often destructive
and disempowering. In fact, we spend so
much of our time remorsing over the
past and worrying about the
future that many of us miss the present moment, which is what life is really
about! This tendency to think too much
has a bad effect on sleep. Sometimes,
the problem is as simple as the child is too worked up feeling emotions or
thinking about something, especially if they’ve just finished watching
something exciting or playing enervating video games. Even reading a book or listening to music can cause
trouble. In fact, there should not be a
TV in your child’s bedroom, and it is best if the bedroom is quiet, dark and
cool. Small sleeping chambers and larger
rooms for play and possessions is a good choice. It is best if they have a period of quiet time
without play and stimulation to calm down at least 30 minutes before sleep (an
hour is best). Be sure to not give them
sweets any time before bedtime, even if that means no dessert with dinner,
because that will get turned into sugar and may irritate the stomach
(indigestion) or be turned into fat (both of which happened to me), not to
mention the possibility of diseases like diabetes. If they DO eat sweets, they will need to
exercise as soon as is practical to burn it off before bed but, remember,
exercise immediately before bed may make it harder for them to sleep. One
excellent idea, especially for pre-primary students, is to read them a nice
story before bedtime – and be patient if they ask questions, don’t seem to pay
attention, tell the story their own way, or seem distracted. This quality time develops imagination and
an interest in reading, which will be critical in later life, and strengthens the bonds with you.
Follow this up by doing specific exercises to calm their mind.
There are many techniques and you will have to discover what works best
for your child (not you): abdominal breathing techniques (a meditational form
of this is the Chinese Qi Gong), visual imagery to remove thoughts and emotions
from their minds, praying, stretching exercises that use all the muscles of the
body to release tension, telling the mind to be quiet, meditation, singing or
chanting quietly the same song, or something else that helps them turn off
their thoughts and feelings. Routine is
an effective way to develop this habit so sleep comes quickly, and it will also
give the children a sense of security.
For
those who have never heard of abdominal breathing and how to do it, I already posted a short article. Abdominal breathing for relaxation
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